Your Magenta Monday Magic.
Wow – 30 years!
It’s hard to believe, but my husband and I are celebrating our 30-year anniversary today, and I have to say that it feels really good to be able to say that.
There was a time early on in our marriage that I didn’t think we were going to make it. In fact, we almost didn’t. As I mentioned last week, I had gotten to a point in my life where I didn’t recognize myself.
That was a really rough time. I was mired in shame because I didn’t understand how I could be so unhappy with the beautiful life I had created. I was also incredibly lonely – because of my shame, I isolated myself. 😟
I wasn’t clear about what was going on with me – or who I had become – but I was bound and determined to figure ‘it’ out. I had no idea at the time what ‘it’ was, but I knew that something had to shift!
During that time I questioned everything. 🤔 I remember writing in my journal ‘What if I lose everything?’ There were all kinds of big questions I needed to ask, because I knew for sure that I didn’t want to wake up one day, look at my husband and say, “who are we and where have we been for the past 20 years?”
More than anything, I knew I wanted to be fully present for all the gifts I had in my life – and I knew I had many. I wanted to feel the passion for life that I knew was possible. I wanted to make my time here on this planet count for something.
I didn’t realize it then, but what I was craving was presence and purpose.
In our fast-paced and often distracted world, it's easy to lose sight of the present moment. We may find ourselves constantly preoccupied with our phones, responsibilities, or worries about the future. Longing for "presence" reflects a desire to be fully engaged in the here and now, to appreciate the beauty of life's small moments, and to connect with the people around us on a deeper level.
It's a moment of awakening when we understand that the pursuit of material success or societal expectations may not provide the fulfillment we seek. Instead, we start seeking fulfillment in the moments we spend fully engaged in the present and in aligning our actions with our sense of purpose.
And what I’ve learned in the years that followed, is that one of the simplest and most powerful tools we have to find more presence to the gifts in our lives is gratitude.
Monday Mindshift
It’s the 1° shift that makes the biggest difference over time.
We’ve talked about how midlife is a hotbed for transition. It’s when we find ourselves saying goodbye to our kids, exploring our life’s next options, taking care of our parents or in-laws, and seeing friends, family members or even ourselves become ill, all while experiencing the ups and downs of menopause.
If your story is anything like mine, and you haven’t kept track of who you are or you haven’t checked in to make sure you’re doing alright in the midst of all the people and things you are taking care of – you could be dealing with a veritable shit show! 🤯 (pardon the language!)
Here’s the thing though; with the right tools, you can learn to navigate anything that life throws at you. And it will continue throwing things at you, because, you know, that’s life! And this midlife chapter is chock-full of change and transition….
With the right tools in hand though, you can start to see this chapter as one of possibility instead of crisis. Because that is exactly what it is – a time of possibility.
Learning to manage it all starts deep within you. Because until you dedicate the time it takes to fully understand who you are, and what YOUR needs are, you will continue to get sucked up into any chaos that surrounds you. Once you come to truly know yourself, you can shift instead into becoming the eye of the storm.
Life’s transitions – particularly those that occur in midlife – will just keep coming at you, regardless of whether or not you’re ready for them.
In fact, as Bruce Feiler, author of the book Life is In the Transitions Mastering Change at Any Age says, the total number of ‘disruptors’ (or what I call transitions) that the average adult faces is between thirty to forty! He learned this while listening to the life stories of 225 people while conducting extensive research for his book. (a great read if you have the time!)
In other words…buckle up people!
While you’re at it, it’s a great idea to have some tools and coping mechanisms at the ready. That way, when you feel like you’re being swept up into the storm of life, you’ll be better able to stay grounded and calm.
Start with gratitude – develop a practice of grounding in it.
Recognize the beautiful things you have in your life. Even if you’ve lost someone you love, allow space for the grief and sadness, and also the gratitude for having had the chance to love deeply. Be grateful for everyone who has touched your life and for all you’ve been through (yes even the menopause rollercoaster!) and recognize how much stronger and wiser you are for having been through it all.
Ground yourself in gratitude that you are here, with your feet firmly planted, getting ready (and excited!) for everything that comes next. ☺️
Living BRIGHTer is...
B - Be Brave
R - Cultivate Relationships
I - Live with Intention
G - Practice Gratitude
H - Prioritize Health
T - Live your Truth
What is Magenta?
The color magenta is one of universal harmony and emotional balance. It is spiritual yet practical, encouraging common sense and a balanced outlook on life. Magenta helps to create harmony and balance in every aspect of life; physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
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